Dear ... home to be

Man, sometimes having all this extra money feels like a curse. I'll find a place to live and figure things out. Who I want to be. WHAT THE FUCK I want to do with my life. This fashion world is not taking me anywhere at the moment. I feel like I am fighting on my own and with no amunition. I'm scared I am alone. I have no one to love me or make love to me. Yeah I must love myself, blah blah but when was the last time a guy took me on a date?!! hmm 2 years ago? and no this whole going clubbing and eyeing each other out as future fuck buddies does not constitute as a date. ok i did have dinner a few times with this one guy but he lives in a different country and I just went out with him just to fill up my weekend nights when I had nothing to do. Ugh. My life is sooooooooooooo not where I want it to be.

But let me be grateful I am not in a worse situation.