It is only now after having had a get together with the guy (who practically sponsored my life here financially) that I realised I was dependent on him too much. My hapiness was jeopardised by the thought that he could replace me with another woman just like that and I was blinded by the fact that he was open from the get go about his lifestyle. I realise I need to be stronger, be more independent. Start a business. Try, if I fail, at least I gave it a chance. Now my biggest worries are being able to live and work and this city as I have to deal with a lot of paperwork in the next weeks to come. I need to cleanse myself of the past. My old habits. I need to renew myself and I hope all goes well and I am setting my sights on conquering the world (so to speak) starting this fall.